Well, we both finally recovered. Solid food is still something of a novelty and we are both a bit thinner than before, but things are slowly returning to normal. Work is not being fun for either of us at the moment and the weather is cold and gray and wet. So we are perhaps a bit down. But not too bad. We still have one another, and that makes up for a lot.

"Time, time time.. see what's become of me.."
Maybe the reason I love Doctor Who so much is my fascination with the effects of time. One of the thing I love about living in an old house (and just being in old places in general) is the sense of seeing and touching and hearing what others have before me -- the sense that, if only I blur my senses a bit I could *be* in another place, another time.

I've been having that sense a fair amount lately with all this YPAS reunion stuff going on. I keep getting letters from people I knew when they were between 16-18 years of age. Except they are now all in their 30's and are sending me pictures of their own kids. Odd that. And odd to think that in a few months I'll be 50. I've always told people that the secret they don;t tell you about growing older is that, from your perspective, you don't. You don;t feel especially different from the person you were at 16 when you are 46. You just notice a difference in the way others react to you. And the older I get, the truer it seems to be.

And lastly, I got an e-mail from my former sister-in-law (who would always have called in the past, but social climbing like time seems to be able to change much) that her grandmother died last week. I am caught between hurt that someone who used to swear blind that I would ALWAYS be a member of the family could so marginalize me, and sincere mourning at the passing of a great lady. My former Grandmother-in-law was one of those people who seemed to have been made to be a grandparent; complete with wobbly grandma arms that always seemed ready to dispense hugs. She always treated me with great kindness, and the last time I saw her (shortly after we were married) she stage whispered (deaf as a post, she was) how happy she was for me, and how lucky I was "to have gotten a pretty one". Mamaw always left me smiling, and I will miss her more than most people I've been genetically related to.
Requisat in Pace

Need to call for former Mother in Law, as I know she'll be hurting and if there's anything I can do, I want to. I love her dearly too.

 
Dear God! Now I truely know that love is a two-way street. Got up in the middle of the night the have a pee and promptly puked up more stuff than could have POSSIBLY been insdie me. There must be some sort of interdimensional wormhole insdie me (or perhaps I'm really a TARDIS) and I was channelling the detrius of some other galaxy.

And then, just to prove it meant business, my body decided to vent just a much out the other end. I did this (with very brief respits) for 10 hours. Couldn't even take a sip of water, because I knew it would come up again in about 5 minutes. That was the worst thing; I was thirstier than I think I've even been in my life.

Finally managed to suck on some ice.. after about 14 hours, a few spoonfuls of rice. Today we borh had crackens and had to agree that they were THE GREATEST DAMNED CRACKERS EVER MADE! :D

That was Tuesday. Last night I started running 103 temp, so my beloved (sick though she was) bundled my butt off to the emergency room, had me poekd and prodded, and then brought me home.

Ain't love grand? To hell with the "sweet mystery" BS. What matters is knowing that you're with yer best friend, somebody who'll stand with you no matter what. After my history, this just comes as a constant surprise. Hell, my last wife used to get enraged when I got sick. Shortly after we got married, I got the flu and she gave me this look and said "You have two days to get better." I laughed, and she said "I'M NOT kidding."

And she wasn't, either.

I've been berated and abused and abandoned. And now I finally have someone who is loyal to the bone. (And yet still there are people who object to our being together. They can go straight to hell.)

Ick! Feeling queezy again... gonna go lie down.

 
Life is always exciting. Not really nice exciting, always... but exciting. First the furnace went out (and it is coooold) then I came home yesterday to find Jacquelyn projectile vomiting all over creation. Spent the night running in with wastbaskets lined with garbage bags and running out again to empty them. You know you REALLY love somebody when their puke doesn't bother you. Besides, she'd do it for me in a heartbeat. She's just that kind of friend. So how could I be less?

And we had a feral cat living on the property. I don;t think that this is the same one that used to bring me dead voles and leave them on the front steps as prezzies when I first moved in.. though it looks a lot like her. Have glimpsed her twice.. and she has been at the garbage bags (but if she goes after the ones from last night, she's in for a surprise!). So we put some food out for her, though it remains untouched thus far. As has the salt lick I put down by the woods in an effort to coax the small herd of deer back that are occassionally to be seen in the back yard.

God, I LOVE living here!

Anyway.. Furnace Guy just left, and all is weel (or at least warm) again. Jacquelyn is sleeping quietly now, with the pup by her side. Haven't seen her buddy Duncan for awhile.. she's proably under something.

Have been having the nicest time regaining contact with people I taught back around 1982-1990 or so. The school is having a reunion for the first ten year graduates (check it out HERE) and after posting a note, I've heard from friends I've not seen in 15-20 years! It's been so nice. Haven't decided whether or not to go to the reunion... but it's in May, so I have awhile to dither.

 
Well it begins.
I don;t know if this diary (excuse me.. "blog") will fare any better that the hundred or so I've begun in my short life. I am not a diarist; I lack the organizational skills. And yet a constant train of thoughts, reflections, and comments runs through my head 24/7. Perhaps if I could set some of them down in print I could sleep at night?

I got onto this service via my friend Avi, an awesomely cool lady who used to whip my butt at ISketch. This blog will be nowhere near as adventurous as hers, if for no other reason than that Indiana is not as interesting as New Zealand. And the odds of me jumping out of a plane (asa Avi details in a recent post are "slim" and "none"

Anyway... I'll try. Right now I'm just rying to learn to use the service. Eventually I'd like to archive my old ramblings and add pictures. But for right now, it is enough that I have begun. As Dickenson wrote, "This is my letter to the world".